Why are you so resentful and crestfallen?
We all have our moments where our temper and regret can get the better of us. Yet, there may be situations in our lives where those negative emotions begin to spiral out of control and begin to fall to the level where Cain may have been. Cain was clearly envious of Abel, angry at God, and ultimately confused by pride.
As we saw with Cain and Abel, resentment (and the underlying capital sins), if left unchecked, can lead to more serious offenses against God, self, and neighbor.
Are there times in our lives where we might be hearing God calling us...asking us why we are so resentful and crestfallen? It was Saint Augustine that said, “Resentment is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.” The reality is that resentment damages our relationship with God and, in the process, unsettles us spiritually, psychologically, and even mentally and sometimes physically.
Still, we all carry hurts and pains in our lives. So, how can we know when the cross we think the Lord has asked us to carry is really a resentment that we need to let go of? Here are a few thoughts for consideration.
Silent treatment after an argument - Do we ever find ourselves shying away from talking through issues with someone in our life? Does the hurt we feel toward the person cause us to withdraw from them? As much as we might want to say something, is is a challenge to find the words?
Keeping Score - Do we find ourselves dwelling on the past mistakes of someone in our life? Do you find ourselves consumed with feelings that someone in our life “owes” us something for the things they have done to us or for the things they have neglected to do for us?
Mountains out of molehills - Do we constantly find ourselves reacting irrationally to the bad habits of someone in our life? Do we try to control the smallest aspects of another person’s life?
Diminished affection - Do we tend to shut down in the presence of someone? Do we find excuses to avoid being in their presence? Are there other ways we withhold love from someone in our life?
Sarcastic or Passive Aggressive Comments - Is there someone in our life that is consistently the target of our jokes? Do we make comments toward them that are fueled with negativity? Is the source of our comments coming from a sense of revenge, envy, or some other negative sentiment?
Saint Maximilian Kolbe taught that resentment and bitterness are harmful to our spirituality, but they can be overcome by choosing to have a positive attitude. Let us renew our resolve to truly accept the people and circumstances in our lives for who and what they are. Let us renew our resolve to forgive the people in our lives that we feel have hurt us, and that may include ourselves and perhaps even God. Let us renew our resolve to surrender our need to control, to surrender our need for revenge, to surrender our need to even the score, to surrender our need to be right, and ultimately to surrender every aspect of our lives to the care of God. Let us renew our resolve to simply let go and let God. Let us renew our resolve to be grateful for all of the blessings God has given us in our lives. Let us renew our resolve to always offer to God a sacrifice of praise.
Thanks be to God.
Great homily, Deacon Scott Sparks...keep up the good work, God bless you! I'm so proud of you!
ReplyDeleteHope to attend one of your masses again soon!