Friday, December 20, 2024

Ahaz or Mary: Friday of the Third Week of Advent (IS 7:10-14, PS 24:1-2, 3-4AB, 5-6, LK 1:26-38)

At first glance, Ahaz may seem very pious, but the more we get into the details of the context, we come to realize his response has less to do with piety and more to do with a desire to simply remain ignorant to the truth.


All of this reminded me of a stage I went through when I was first coming back to the Church.  


Shortly after I started to attend Mass with Virginia, I noticed an ad for Covenant Network radio on the back of the bulletin and I decided to check it out.  Long story short, one of the first shows I caught was  “The Lamb’s Supper” with Scott Hahn and Mike Aquilina.  I was immediately captivated by their descriptions of the book of Revelation, and I was hooked to Catholic Radio.


I started listening to the afternoon call-in shows.  These shows were invaluable in terms of how they helped me in the initial phases of my conversion process.  Especially in terms of resuscitating some level of conscience and rebuilding some sense of a catechetical foundation/framework from which I could live life.


All of that being said, I was still avoiding the Truth.  


It was common for me to shut off the radio because I didn’t want to hear what they were about to say.  If someone asked a question where I could tell they were talking about some sinful pattern I was still entertaining in my life, I just shut the radio off.  I remember thinking “surely the Catholic Church does not teach that”.  The reality is: I was still blind and didn’t want to see.  I wanted a sign but, deep down, I knew I didn’t want to see it.


After a couple of months of this, Virginia and I went to a Bible study here at Incarnate Word.  One evening, the facilitator (a lady named Alice Watson) went on a tangent about living a sinful life, and she shot a look at me that bore a hole right through my skull and touched my very soul.  I have no doubt God spoke through her in that moment.  It was extremely powerful.  I feel like I blushed the deepest darkest red you can possibly imagine and I looked around to see if anyone else noticed the look she gave me.  I will tell you this, she could have hit me with a sledgehammer and the hammer would have had less of an effect on me than that look did.  


I knew at that point, that it was time to take a hard look at my sinful life.  I immediately stopped turning off the radio whenever a personality was about to tell me something I didn’t want to hear.  I finally started to learn about the true Jesus, the true Christian faith, and the true moral life.


A big topic on the radio at that time was examinations of conscience.  I found a good one, and I went to work.  The level of conviction I received from the Holy Spirit left me literally trembling for two weeks before I could muster the strength to go to the confessional.  My first confession in over 15 years.


In many ways that evening with Alice was the beginning of my spiritual journey.  A spiritual journey that has been both beautiful and challenging, and has culminated (so far)in the diaconate.  That change was not overnight by any means, and the Good Lord knows I still have a lot of conversion to go.  


Throughout this journey, I have learned that every day offers a choice…a choice to be an Ahaz or a Mary…a choice to ignore the Truth or embrace it.  I’m not going to lie, I have chosen to be Ahaz more times than I care to admit.  But, gratefully, I have chosen to be a Mary more than I probably realize.  


For me, I simply endeavor to simply do the next right thing…the thing where God has the opportunity to do great things through me in order to extend the Kingdom of the Sacred Heart of Jesus in the world around me…which is ultimately what Christmas is all about.


That is our spiritual invitation for today, particularly as we continue to prepare for the Christmas season.  What are those ways that we tend to be an Ahaz?  When are those times that we choose to look the other way when we are confronted with a hard teaching of the Church or another objective truth revealed by God?  When are those times that God is trying to work through us, but we would rather do our own thing?


Saint Maximilian Kolbe said, “No one in the world can change Truth. What we can do and should do is to seek truth and to serve it when we have found it.”   


Brothers and sisters, when we truly become a servant of Truth, then we (like Mary) will more clearly see the favor we have with God.


Thanks be to God!


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