Let Go and Let God (Prov 3:5-6)

Trust in the LORD with all your heart, on your own intelligence do not rely; In all your ways be mindful of him, and he will make straight your paths. Proverbs 3:5-6

“Let Go and Let God” has become a popular mantra in spiritual circles, especially those of 12-step recovery programs.  It is a very simple concept, but a very difficult one to put into practice.  Human nature is tuned to sing “I Did It My Way”.  As a result, our spirituality becomes a tug-of-war between our desire to let God’s will be done and our desire to control the people, places, and things in our life.

The ultimate goal is to let go of all expectations, all resentments, and all negative thoughts and memories.  In short, we need to detach from all things that can stand in the way of our relationship with God and leave us feeling restless, irritable, and/or discontent.

Simply put, our human nature is programmed for self-delusion.  The delusions all of us must face obscure the way we see the world, including our relationship with God.  Some of the more common delusions we must face include (Presence 22.4):

·         I would be more spiritual if my circumstances were different

·         My lack of serenity is due to my circumstances

·         I expect certain outcomes from our spiritual practices

·         My spiritual goals need to be based on my external beliefs

We will discuss each of these delusions in more detail in future posts.  For the time being, suffice it to say, anyone feeling called and/or longing to experience the fullness of a spiritual relationship with God must break the cycle of self-delusion and begin to empty yourself and turn your life and your will to the care of God.  It will likely be an uncomfortable process at first; however, the more the principles are practiced, the more happiness, joyfulness, and freedom will be experienced.

I’ll close this installment with a quote from Meister Eckhart’s ‘The Talk of Instruction’, “Whoever has all his will and what he wants is joyful.  No one has that but he whose will and God's will are one. God grant us this oneness.”  That is letting go and letting God.

Entry Point Number 8: Sexual Intercourse Outside of Marriage

Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous. (Hebrews 13:14)

Pope Leo XIII had a vision of Satan boasting to God that he could destroy the Church.  We know Satan looks for our weak points to exploit and uses a number of weapon on us to pull us a way from Christ…often without us even realizing it.  Of the weapons at Satan’s disposal, I believe our sexuality is among the most effective.  If fact, part of the revelation at Fatima was that souls are falling into hell like snowflakes due to sins of the flesh.

There are statistical facts to support this type of spiritual warfare is occurring.  It is estimated that 3%-5% of the U.S. population.  Roughly 25% of all search engine requests are pornography related.  Even more people suffer from relationship addictions.  Addiction is first and foremost a spiritual malady.  Therefore, we must acknowledge and accept the risks of spiritual bondage that comes with sexual intercourse outside of marriage and take back what the evil spirits have been able to take from us.

The explanation for why this is such a powerful weapon for Satan actually comes from Genesis 2:24.  Two becomes one doesn’t simply refer to sharing one mailing address.  Marriage in and of itself is a sacrament (a visible representation of an invisible reality) of what occurs during intercourse.  But, what is this reality? 

When two people have sex, there is a very real metaphysical and spiritual exchange that is designed to create connectivity in a relationship like no other relationship.  Once that connection is made, simply parting ways (even in a civil divorce) does not break the spiritual connection that was created during intercourse. 

They say you never forget your first love.  Despite the whole host of reasons psychology uses to try to explain this phenomenon, the real reason is the existence of this spiritual connection between the partners.  That connection remains after the relationship has ended.  Both partners are left with a sense of longing and a sense of loss since the connection is strained by the parting of ways.  This is the perfect weak moment for Satan to exploit to create a spiritual bondage situation.  To complicate matters, the ongoing rejection of the connection continues to increase the risk of additional exposure as the person longs to “fill the gap”.

A spiritual director can help you work through your past and identify past relationship where this spiritual connection (also known as soul ties) may exist, renounce the connection, establish the authority to take back the spiritual essence  that that was given in that relationship, and renounce any spirits that may have created spiritual bondage.  It can be a pain process to search through ones past in this nature (especially if you think you have already moved on from it), but it is a healing and freeing experience.

Entry Point Number 7: Lies/Denial

No one who practices deceit shall dwell in my house; no one who utters lies shall continue before my eyes. (Psalm 101:7)

As we have discussed in previous posts, sin entered the world through the lens of deceit.  The serpent deceived Eve, Eve passed the deception on to Adam, Adam and Eve then attempted to deceive God by hiding from Him, and then Adam and Eve denied their responsibility by blaming someone else; Adam blamed Eve and Eve blamed the serpent. It ultimately came down to the false promises of impunity, wisdom, and material sustenance.  The temptation was too much for Eve (and subsequently Adam) to resist.

It works in similar fashion for us.  We are tempted by something desired by our flesh, but ultimately it robs us of what we really need.  It can also open us to spiritual bondage, as explain by Neal Lozano:

“Demons serve only themselves and the devil’s purposes.  Their thoughts are always lies, and these lies are destructive thoughts that obscure the nature of God, drawing us into agreement through sin.  Demons seek always to destroy our destiny by separating us from the life of God and by usurping our authority on Earth.  Evil spirits take advantage of our nature by initiating relationships the same way they did in the Garden.  They present to us a temptation characterized by deception, all for the purpose of gaining control.  Our response to that deception gives demons access to us.  We come into bondage based on our sinful response to the empty promises.  First we entertain the lies and the false images in our minds; then, we believe our emotional response; and finally, we surrender our identity to a lie.”

This identification with the lies often creates a veil of denial that prevents us from seeing the truth of a situation.  Think of the addict that cannot see how his/her actions are impacting their friends and families.  Think about how they are always the victim and cannot see how the addiction puts them in the situations they are in.  Think about the narcissist that can never be wrong.  If they are wrong, it has to be because someone else gave them bad information or made a mistake.  But, the reality is that we all have these spiritual blind spots that hamper our spiritual growth.  These blind spots grow over time, often without giving us any clue to their existence.

To experience the fullness of Christ’s presence in our lives, we must learn to identify where these patterns of deception and denial exists in our lives.  We must learn to see those situations for what they really are as opposed to how we have perceived them to be.  A spiritual director can be an objective partner in talking through different perspectives of a situation, listening to where God is in the situation, and discerning the Light and Truth of Christ in the situation.   In the cases where the situation has deteriorated to spiritual bondage, a spiritual director can help guide through renouncing of the spirits involved and taking authority back over the situation in order to attain true freedom and peace in Christ.

Entry Point Number 6: Rebellion/Disobedience

For rebellion is as the sin of divination, and presumption is as iniquity and idolatry. Because you have rejected the word of the Lord, he has also rejected you from being king.  (1 Samuel 15:23)

Rebellion and disobedience has been a normal part of the human condition since Adam and Eve first bit into the forbidden fruit.  There is something hardwired into us (pride) that continually frames our response to “I’ll do it my way.”  Too often we make decisions and react to situations with no regard to what God’s will is for us.  Satan can use these moments of disobedience (especially significant episodes) to attack us and put us under spiritual bondage.

As we’re reminded by the St. Padre Pio Center for Deliverance Counseling, “It is the will of God for us to be obedient to parents, to civil government, to the Church, and to the pastors who are over us. We have two biblical responsibilities in regard to these authority figures: 1) Pray for them; and 2) submit to them. The only time God permits us to disobey those in authority over us is when they require of us an act or acquiescence in ways that are contrary to Church Law, Natural Law, or Divine Law.”

That leaves a lot of opportunity for us to be rebellious, even if we don’t realize we are being rebellious.  Perhaps you like to drive faster than the speed limit.  Perhaps you like to push the limit with your employer.  Perhaps you pick and choose what you want to believe relative to what is taught by the Church.  These are all examples of rebellion that can leave yourself open to bondage.

Following the line authority is an act of faith where we must believe the person’s source of authority is God and that they will ultimately be judged by how they used that authority.  But, following the line of authority does not mean you should allow someone to abuse you.  If you feel someone in authority is being abusive, then you will likely need to ensure there are appropriate boundaries and potentially make the decision to end the relationship.  Discussing this matter with a spiritual director can help you frame the situation, understand where God is in the midst of it, find forgiveness and closure, and discern next steps.

A spiritual director can also help you root through any rebellious moments you have had in your past, bring those moments to the Light and Truth of Christ, renounce any spirits that were able to take advantage of those moments, and ultimately help bring healing, closure, and freedom in Christ! 

Entry Point Number 5: Involvement in the Occult

He immolated his child by fire. He practiced soothsaying and divination, and reintroduced the consulting of ghosts and spirits.  He did much evil in the LORD’s sight and provoked him to anger. (2 Kings 21:6).

Sensationalized movies like Ouija and common place novelty items like horoscopes tend to desensitize us to the dangers present in the occult.  But, the reality is that anything that seeks knowledge or power (including favors and wishes) outside of the Holy Spirit could potentially be deemed of the occult, and therefore of Satan.  To make matters worse, our culture has ingrained so many occult practices into our daily lives that we have often assimilated many of them into habitual activities before we were old enough to even spell occult. 

At what age were you when you first made a wish on a falling star, looked for a four-leaf clover, carried a rabbit’s foot, or even blew out birthday cake candles?  These are all examples of traps set by the evil one to desensitize us to the difference between luck and grace.  This desensitization (and related relativism) works to open the door to spiritual bondage and puts us at risk of inadvertently worshipping him (Satan) through these superstitions as opposed to worshipping the one almighty God.

The World Apostolate of Fatima published a chilling thought on the topic:

“Many people live in sin and have false peace, because their conscience has been formed, not by the Gospel, but by the spirit of this age.  They may be leading very respectable lives, be law-abiding citizens, and in the estimation of people, leading good lives. But if they are not living according to the Ten Commandments, the Gospel, and the moral teaching of the Church, even in just one area that concerns serious sin, they are probably living in the Kingdom of Darkness.”

If you have been involved in the occult, it is important that you repent of the activity as soon as possible.  For Catholics, the Sacraments of Reconciliation and the Eucharist are especially powerful weapons Jesus gave us to overcome this.  Non-Catholics should repent to the Lord, admit to another person their involvement (see entry point 1), and pray for spiritual communion with the Lord.

It is often necessary to renounce evil spirits involved in the occult and to renounce occult itself.  A spiritual director familiar with spiritual bondage can help with this discernment of spirits and help guide through the appropriate renunciations.  Furthermore, a spiritual director can help be a level of accountability as one begins to distance themselves from the familiar ways of the occult to the Way of Jesus Christ. 

Entry Point Number 4: Family Sin

I, the LORD, your God, am a jealous God, inflicting punishment for their ancestors’ wickedness on the children of those who hate me, down to the third and fourth generation (Exudos 20:5).

The subject of family sin and generational curses is an extremely complex topic that we will likely discuss in future posts.  Having said that, there are relational experiences evil spirits can use as an entry point for demonic oppression.  In particular, this is a common occurrence in codependent relationships.

According to Yozefu B. Ssemakula,  Satan uses circumstances of life, behaviors, and disease to stick bondage into our families.  In these, we can generally see the behaviors, attitudes, sins or habits that Satan can exploit.  If it shows up twice in a family, there is a high chance that it is a case of family bondage.  Take the case of alcoholic brothers.  Even if their parents do not drink, it is likely that grandparents and/or other ancestors had the same struggles.  It is also likely that descendants will have the same struggle unless the bondage is broken and healing brought to the family. 

Think about the patient in-take form you complete at the physician.  There are a number of questions on the in-take for regarding your family health history; yet, there is very little scientific proof to support a true genetic connection to these patterns.  However, if you think about it in terms of this subject, it starts to make sense.  All of us have had ancestors that committed serious sins against God.  Regardless of whether they repented before the Lord, there is still consequences for the sin that must be settled (2 Sam 12:13-14).  Too often, the descendants are left to deal with the consequences.

How are we to respond to these situations in our family?  The invitation is to turn it over to God and allow His mercy to wipe away the consequences and to break the family bondage that may exist between generations.  Too often, however, we try to maintain control of these aspects of our lives.  Therefore, the consequences continue to challenge us and never seem to improve.

A spiritual director can help sort through the various behaviors, attitudes, sins and habits in order to discern where a family bondage situation may exist.  They can also be a guide in learning to accept the consequences for what they are, mentor in how to surrender the situation to the Lord, and provide a level of accountability when attempting to take control back. The spiritual director can then assist in renouncing spirits, renouncing breaking unhealthy relationship spiritual connections, and praying for family/generational healing.  

Entry Point Number 3: Trauma

In their distress they cried to the LORD, who saved them in their peril;He brought them forth from darkness and the shadow of death and broke their chains asunder.  (Psalms 107:13-14)

They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder.  Trauma is the same way.  An experience that may not be a big deal from your perspective could be a very traumatic experience for someone else.  These traumatic experiences can have a severe impact on someone’s spiritual life and become an entry point for an evil spirit.

One of the most common examples of this is grief.  Grief can come in many forms and from many sources.  Generally, grief is relatively brief and progresses through the 5 stages without complication.  Other times, however, the grief becomes a perpetual state of extreme mourning.  It could be the loss of a significant person in one’s life, the loss of one’s identity, or the loss of anything else that one had become dependent on for a sense of well-being.  

While there are certainly psychological causes that may lead grief to escalate into this extreme trauma, it is also possible for an evil spirit to use the grieving process as an entry point for the purpose of oppression.  In either case, the grieving period can seem to continue without progression through the stages of grieving.

In the cases of traumatic experiences, it is often beneficial for the person to work with a counselor and a spiritual director in tandem.  A counselor can help the person sort things out from a psychological perspective and use tools such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to help the person learn to cope with the trauma.  In the meantime, a good spiritual director can help the person discern the spiritual impact of the trauma and find God in the midst of the pain.  Any evil spirits identified can be renounced and spiritual wounds can be exposed to the Light and Truth of Christ for healing.

Furthermore, we can find ourselves living in a spiritual bondage caused by trauma and not be aware of it.  Between the veil of denial sewn by the evil spirit and our own psyche’s ability to adapt, we live our life believing the way we feel is just normal life…ignorant of the fact that a higher level of freedom is available in Christ.  In spiritual direction, we often uncover the traumatic experiences that have been buried in years of denial and find a new spiritual life and freedom when the bondage is released.

Entry Point Number 2: Curses

When we think of curses, we often think of witches, warlocks, and voodoo priestesses. But, the curses we have in our lives are usually either self-imposed or come from comments (often innocent comments) made by those in our everyday lives.

It is common for tweens to gain weight prior to a growth spurt.  Imagine if a female tween had a grandparent or other impressionable relative that made jokes to feel more comfortable in certain situations.  If this relative made some innocent (albeit ill-advised) comments about the tween's weight to be humorous, the message she internalized could end up being an open door for an evil spirit to start influencing them.  This could lead to depression, anorexia, addictions, or even suicide. 

Some of us may directly relate to the tween example.  Regardless, most of us have had similar experiences during fragile times that have left emotional impressions.  If you are carrying a spiritual weight related to those experiences, there may be some influence from an evil spirit involved. 

Curses can be self-inflicted as well.  Perhaps we failed a big test in school and came away with an internalized message that we are not good enough.  Or, perhaps a crush we had in school rejected us in front of our friends and we internalized a message that we are ugly.  These are other opportunities for an evil spirit to begin influencing our lives and hold us in spiritual bondage.

A spiritual director can help us:

·         explore these painful moments in our life and expose them to the Light and Truth of Christ

·         understand what part we played in receiving the curse (i.e., agreement with a person of authority in the case of the tween example, or a fear of rejection in the case of the self-inflicted example)

·         renounce the evil spirits that are involved in how the curse is made manifest today

Entry Point Number 1: Unconfessed / Repeated Sin

Those who conceal their sins do not prosper, but those who confess and forsake them obtain mercy. (Prov 28:13)

Sin takes us right back to the Garden of Eden.  It is an act of disobedience and rejection of God’s will where we, like Eve, exercise the will to become "like gods," knowing and determining good and evil (Gen 3:5).  No one is a stranger to sin in and of itself.  We all do it…every day.  Anyone who claims not to sin is suffering from denial and could possibly be under the influence of a demon.

Where the problem comes into play is how we react to sin in our lives. Here are some common reactions of which a demon can take advantage:

“Oh well.  God will forgive me.”

This reaction can start innocently enough whereby the person is contrite about the sin with the intention of a deeper conversion to Christ.  However, an evil spirit can take this mindset and influence the person to a position of presumption, which means the person may start to expect forgiveness without a contrite heart or have no intention for a deeper conversion.  The person may even begin to believe they can save themselves without the grace of God.

“Well, everyone else is doing it.”

This kind of insidious relativism is rampant in our culture and easy to fall into without realizing it.  It is particularly rampant in circles of addiction.  An addict will often use this as an excuse to indulge in their vice.  Eventually, it progresses to the point where the person no longer pauses to make the excuse.  They often begin to add another vice to their addiction.  Why they would do that…because everyone else is doing it.  Beware non-addicts, you are just a susceptible to this trap as the addict is, even if the result isn’t as evident as something like alcoholism or drug abuse.

“I don’t believe it is wrong.”

Most likely, this one starts out as one of the other two in some, way, shape, or form.  The bottom line is there is generally only one truth, but millions of perceptions of that truth.  For example, abortion cannot be both morally acceptable and morally unacceptable.  That’s an extreme case, but very illustrative.  It applies to every other moral decision we make every day.  We tell ourselves it is not wrong to tell the little white lie.  We tell ourselves it is not wrong to talk about someone behind their back.  Like other evil spiritual influences, the more things we are convinced are not wrong, the more open we are to accept that other (more morally questionable things) are not wrong.  Eventually, we don’t really know what is right or wrong any more.

For the sake of brevity, I have only given three examples, but there are plenty of messages evil spirits give us to convince us to not confess our sins.

The best defense against this exposure is to have a properly formed conscience and to examine your conscience every day.  When you have identified a sin (especially a major, or mortal, sin) confess your sin to someone right away. 

There are various resources to help you form your conscience and there are a variety of methods to examine your conscience.  A good spiritual director can help you sort through these options and be a companion as the Lord guides you through this process.

A note on confessing your sins to others, this post is not intended to become a theological debate regarding going straight to God to confess sins vs confessing to another person.  The idea of talking through these issues with someone else is based on sound psychology and on the practices of what works in 12 step recovery programs.  Consider the following from the Alcoholics Anonymous version of Step 5:

• “Some people are unable to stay sober at all; others will relapse periodically until they really clean house.”
• “Most of us would declare that without a fearless admission of our defects to another human being we could not stay sober.  It seems plain that the grace of God will not enter to expel our destructive obsessions until we are willing to try this.”

In my experience, the excuse that I can confess my sins directly to God is really just a coping mechanism for fear….fear that I would be rejected if someone else was to find out who I really am.  Fear is an open door for an evil spirit to influence.  If you don’t already do so, start confessing your sins to someone else (someone you can trust to keep it in confidence).  Overcoming the fear to be vulnerable with someone else to confess your sins is often very spiritually liberating.

Mental Illness or Demonic Oppression

Now the snake was the most cunning of all the wild animals that the LORD God had made.  (Gen 3:1)

Richard Gallagher, a board-certified psychiatrist and professor of clinical psychiatry at New York Medical College, recently commented on how many patients who suffer from mental illness are likely suffering from demonic possession.  I agree the role of demonic influence in our society is greatly underestimated, but the actual occurrences of full possession are quite limited.  Demonic oppression, on the other hand, is extremely common.

Demonic oppression is exactly what it sounds like; i.e., an evil spirit oppresses the person.  There are two very clear examples of this in the Bible.  The first example is the temptation of Eve, in the Garden of Eden (Gen 3:1-24), and second is the three temptations of Jesus in the wilderness (Matt 4:1-11).  Eve fell to the temptation of the evil spirit and came into spiritual bondage.  Conversely, Jesus was able to renounce the evil spirit and therefore gain spiritual deliverance (i.e., freedom).  

Demonic oppression can be the root cause of a number of many mental/psychological issues, including: depression, codependency, anger, anxiety, rebellion, compulsion, and addiction, as well as a variety of sinful behaviors.  It can even lead to physical ailments and disease.  It is often characterized as a heaviness on the heart, feelings of being distant to God, and otherwise feeling spiritually dead.

The good news is that we can renounce the evil spirits, similar to the way Jesus did in the wilderness.  We will discuss renouncing evil spirits in more detail as part of future posts.  In the meantime, it is helpful to understand how we leave ourselves open for demonic oppression and can even put ourselves at risk for full possession.

According to Neal Lozano, these are the most common entry points used by evils spirits for the purpose of oppression:

·         Unconfessed / Repeated Sin

·         Curses

·         Trauma

·         Family Sin

·         Occult Activities

·         Rebellion/Disobedience

·         Lies/Denial

·         Sexual Intercourse Outside Marriage

In future posts, we will discuss how each of these entry points items are used by evil spirits as well as some spiritual tools at our disposal to ensure these entry points are no longer exploited by the evil spirits. 

Bear in mind that evil spirits are cunning and baffling, just as we saw in the Garden of Eden with the temptation of Eve.  Doubt and denial are among their most powerful weapons.  They plant seeds of doubt that cloud judgement of yourself, of your faith, and (worst of all) of God.  Meanwhile, they sew a veil of denial that can lead to a life of self-deception, spiritual blindness, and pride.  This is where a good spiritual director, or other trusted spiritual advisor/companion, can help to encourage you through the moments of doubt and cut through the denial that shade you from the full Light and Truth of Christ. 

Once we accept that spiritual oppression is a very real and a very common factor in our lives, we can begin to understand how spiritual influences are made manifest in our lives.  Based on this understanding, we can then begin to identify and renounce the associated evil spirits and make the necessary changes to prevent further influence.  In short, we can achieve true freedom in Christ!